Don’t Look Down

I left school early. My stomach was killing me.
I skipped Halpern's class. It was a bad move but we had a test and I knew I couldn't function with my stomach spinning.
I got home and tried eating but every time I do, my pain gets worse. I suppose I'm just not used to having food in me...

Obviously, it would be hard to stop doing something I'm so used to doing, but its harder physically than emotionally. Is it bad that I would only stop hurting myself for others' worries and not for my own? I'm not thinking "I can't do this to myself." I'm thinking more "I can't let them down."
I feel like other people know what's best for me more than I do. I don't really care about myself...I care about who I'm hurting. I only change for people I care for...never for myself. If I didn't have someone to tell me to stop, I would continue on with no concern for my own saftey.
That's a terrible way to live, but it's the truth.